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*PITCHING*
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*LESSONS*
“don’t back away”
(as a batter)
“step INTO the pitch!”
(this goes against one’s instincts)
(and requires a certain level of trust in your competitor)
(that the pitcher would rather strike you out than hit you)
(and that the pitcher was ABLE TO avoid hitting you)
(are ‘brush-back pitches’ actually illegal in baseball?)
(has anyone died from being hit by a pitch)
(after learning how to “step into” the pitch after the first year of hardball, i soon got into the habit of stepping away from an inside pitch by swinging my left leg counterclockwise so that my chest was facing the mound)
(a convoluted attempt at ‘running away’?)
(my parents told me that i risked being hit in the chest by a pitch)
(and that i should instead turn my left shoulder into the pitch and take the hit)
(or just jump back if all else fails)
(my mother even said that i would have to start wearing a “chest protector” if i continued the practice)
(JUST WHEN I THOUGHT THAT I CONQUERED THE FEAR OF THE PITCH, THEY INSTILLED A NEW FEAR IN ME)
(because i wasn’t afraid of the ball then…i just had a strange reaction to getting out of the way of it…)
(“ray chapman”)
(only major leaguer to die from injuries sustained in a game)
(got hit in the head with a pitch)
(resulting in the ban of the ‘spitball’)
(before this pitchers were expected to ‘dirty up the ball’)
(akin to ‘deflategate’)
(the ‘spitball’ made it harder to see, made its airborne path erratic, and softened it)
(this meant that chapman couldn’t see the ball as it sailed towards his head)
(onlookers said he made no attempt to get out of the way)
(and they didn’t wear helmets then)
(they didn’t start wearing helmets until 1950)
(and some like john olerud started wearing a helmet while playing first base)
(as a right-handed hitter i stood in the left batter’s box)
(i broke my right wrist in summer 1997)
(baseball)
(should’ve learned my lesson then and moved onto the arts and sciences)
(the Edwards children gathered ’round…)
HITTER:
FIELDER (REACTOR AND AGGRESSOR / COOPERATIVE VS. INDIVIDUAL)
THE BATTING INVADES ENEMY’S TERRITORY
by age 8, he graduated to “hardball”.
(he struck out with each at-bat)
(cue *and i went down swinging*)
Then Pizzeria Ponzio took over in Grade 3
(my father’s former Little League teammate)
I struck out nearly every time I came to bat
(Stephen Davidson, Laura Sumas, and I were collective rejects)
sophomore year
(high school)
(‘junior varsity’ player)
(coached by dom mastrionni)
half-heartedly tried out for high school summer team
having a catch with rob eorio on the last day of school
rob santana warned me that excessive weightlifting would ruin my (non-) throwing arm
mike + i are polar opposites
(he is defined by his cannon throwing arm)
(that’s why he’s an outfielder)
i was an outfielder too
(by default)
jeff falzarano left me a voicemail
(broke me down gently)
(told me that my throwing is troublesome)
(and that he’d possibly call upon me during the summer as a designated hitter)
this was when the younger kids (higgins + co) took hold of the baseball program in earnest
(i was relieved)
(wanted to spend the summer lazing away)
(not playing baseball)
(the next year I signed up for lacrosse in a flurry of excitement)
(i played on my first T-ball team in Grade 1)
Team PBA
(Policeman’s Benevolent Association)
It was a fitting moniker for us
(my father always kowtowed to cops and corporate hogs)
(so he tried to control me instead)
i remember when the cops invaded our house and my father stood behind the police officer with a conspiratorial glare
(*see, this is what happens when you fuck with drugs!*)
(*every number’s your number!*)
(*Columbia College admissions* / *you want my honest opinion? you don’t have a chance*)
This is when my father invaded the athletic landscape and tainted it forevermore. He was my first baseball coach.
(the pattern repeated in Grade 2)
Grade 4
(Yankees)
I began a pitching career
I opened up the first game in Greenbrook
(we pitched 2 innings each: me / my younger brother / Jamie Kempson)
Obsession with pitching speed
(Nolan Ryan was an early hero)
The fastball (also called hummer and other names) is the most common type of pitch in baseball. Some “power pitchers,” like Nolan Ryan, Roger Clemens have thrown it at speeds of 95-104 mph (152.9-167.3 km/h) (officially) and up to 107.9 mph (173.6 km/h) (unofficially), relying purely on speed to prevent the ball from being hit.
*Bring in Tommy Beck*
(ex-boyfriend of Aunt Tammy)
New Providence baseball coach
My father quit the Columbia Lions baseball team after his freshman year.
My final year as a baseball player took place during my sophomore year in high school. I played on the JV team and started as a left/right fielder every once a while.
the formation of a lacrosse team gave me an excuse to abandon baseball for good…
The coaching staff was ready to discard me anyway. I was being passed over for summer all-star teams in favor of athletes two years younger than me.
I used weightlifting as a lame excuse for my absolute inability to throw a baseball.
Robeeorio was the strongest man that our grade had seen
(a doppelganger of my father)
And where did that get him? He quit the football and baseball programs. He was a tool of his father / they weightlifted together at Mountain Fitness.
(walking with a man, then throwing him in the garbage)
(my brother was invading the territory)
(my brother conquered the local athletic community)
(at age 6, he began playing “t-ball”)
(cue *slow dance*)
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*👨🔬🕵️♀️🙇♀️*SKETCHES*🙇♂️👩🔬🕵️♂️*
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💕💝💖💓🖤💙🖤💙🖤💙🖤❤️💚💛🧡❣️💞💔💘❣️🧡💛💚❤️🖤💜🖤💙🖤💙🖤💗💖💝💘
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*🌈✨ *TABLE OF CONTENTS* ✨🌷*
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🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥*we won the war* 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥