-as of [13 MAY 2024]–
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(begins 22 december 2015)
(4:48am UT)
(ends 20 march 2016)
(4:30am UT)
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*2015*
(21 december 2014)
(11:03pm universal time)
@ mount’s motel
(lawrenceville NJ)
(no longer attending a job search program)
(rental assistance ends next month)
(must apply for an extension with elisa neira monday morning)
(i have no means of transportation)
(and my driver’s license is expired)
(and i have no money for transportation)
(required to attend a substance abuse program in trenton for 3 months)
(“new horizons”)
(and i’ve repeatedly tested positive for alcohol + THC)
(still receiving $189 / month in foodstamps and $98 /month in general assistance)
(as well as medicaid)
still need to get med 1 forms signed by psychiatrist in order to get 12-month extension @ motel…
(and i’ve been testing positive for alcohol + THC)
(and i need 3 clean urine tests to get the med 1 form signed)
(and i’m required to attend 9 hours of group sessions + 1 individual session + 1 urine test every week)
(and i haven’t been going to group sessions on a regular basis)
(next psychiatric appointment is tuesday march 10 @ 10am)
(the following psychiatric appointment will be in april)
make appointment with urologist to get viagra prescription
several robotrips
several benadryl trips
recording “the common cold”
two open mics with gandharva
(rahway + new brunswick)
performance @ the ivy inn
(with kyle whitmore on drums)
rejected in first round of “the voice”
busking sessions (NY Penn Station + NYC subways)
blackout drunk session in NYC
(lost blackberry / digital camera / CDs / external hard drive)
reconnected with mellow
(loaded up on dope)
plagued by computer shutdowns
christmas eve
(alone @ mount’s motel)
christmas
(brunch @ princeton hyatt with family)
new year’s eve
(alone @ mount’s motel)
(ends 20 march 2015 @ 10:45pm)
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*2014*
(began 21 december 2013 @ 5:11pm)
i was living @ 14 oakland street in princeton NJ
(receiving rental assistance from princeton township)
(ended 20 march 2014 @ 4:57pm)
by this time i was living at the mount’s motel in lawrenceville and attending a job search program at mercer county community college in trenton
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*2013*
(began 21 december 2012 @ 11:12am)
i was living @ 61 clearview avenue in princeton
(i was dependent on handouts to pay my monthly $550 rent)
(i was still not working)
i knew she wasn’t right but i knew i was wrong
my happiness spent…
mama arrived sometime before 9:30am with a single box of CDs and winter clothing.
as i had dreamt, she only brought me a single pair of khakis.
she didn’t bring me any food
(i was counting on this for the next few weeks)
then we went to dunkin’ donuts…i got a “big n’ toasty” and a large iced coffee (the indian chica behind the counter already knows my usual coffee order). then she headed out to mountainside for a tennis match…
i’ve still got booze left from yesterday…i may as well start drinking. i only have 3 cigarettes left and a small coffee from dunkin’ donuts. last night, i notated a single wrong note for the melville “bassline” and it screwed up my night…i got two slices from “pizza star”, a small coffee from dunkin donuts (they didn’t have iced coffee because they were “closing in 5 minutes”), and i promptly called it a night…i slept for far too long…now my legs are sore and i’ll be out of booze, cigs, coffee, and food before long…
ended 20 march 2013 @ 11:02am
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*2012*
(i began the winter living in the family basement)
(watchung NJ)
(we enjoyed a peaceful christmas)
(cheryl gave me $1000 cash)
(the yukon battery kept dying)
(i was on probation after the may 2011 DWI in massachusetts)
(i was promised two long-term jobs by princeton tutoring)
(that both never came to fruition)
(i was drinking heavily on a daily basis)
(i was unemployed)
(i was preparing for the release of a triple album + recording at a prolific rate)
(i was preparing to launch the “dopeland” kickstarter project)
(i was booking shows)
(both solo and duo)
(with roboray on drums)
(i was kicked out of the watchung house after being arrested for assaulting the old man)
(i spent a week in somerset county jail)
(then i bounced around to various friends’ houses before spending a month with grandma skip)
(then cheryl exiled me to the jersey shore mansion until the summer)
(i started applying for jobs at guitar center in springfield)
(the assault charges were dropped + i tried to complete my alcohol education classes)
(i continued to record @ a prolific rate down the jersey shore)
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*2011*
(i was living in the family basement in watchung NJ)
(my unemployment checks stopped coming in january 2011)
(i was dating emma wolin + learning how to have sex)
(had a physical confrontation with the old man @ christmas)
(but i continued living in the basement)
(i was recording + editing video at a prolific rate)
(i was performing as a duo with roboray)
(as well as solo performances with poison ivy)
(i phased from dope smoking –> drinking)
(my relationship with emma ended in the beginning of spring)
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*2010*
(today marks the december solstice for 2009)
something about the changing of the seasons always renders me under the weather. seems i have to pay some sort of biological toll to make it through to season two.
back in mid-december ’09, if you’ll remember, i couldn’t shake a virus for weeks. these invasions always seem to be preceded by my periodic conjugal visits with the world. swapping saliva with a person or two and drinking far too much alcohol. followed by some extremely taxing journey back to home base fraught with unforeseen complications. back in december i missed the last train from ny penn station to summit and to kill the time until 6am i did a long run around manhattan with pack strapped to back. and last sunday it was a punishing round road trip to massachusetts and back.
now i feel that old viral nemesis creeping back into my systems yet again. always starts with a frog in the throat. nothing severe, merely a warning of what is to come. the throat congestion fades after a day or two. then the sleeping pattern is interrupted. then a general feeling of ickiness creeps in after a few days, especially ’round the digestive systems. then i begin to itch all over. then i get the chills. then the sinuses begin to overflow.
this lasts from a few weeks to a month.
(maybe i’m not immune to the world after all)
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💕💝💖💓🖤💙🖤💙🖤💙🖤❤️💚💛🧡❣️💞💔💘❣️🧡💛💚❤️🖤💜🖤💙🖤💙🖤💗💖💝💘
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*🌈✨ *TABLE OF CONTENTS* ✨🌷*
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🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥*we won the war* 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥