(i was preparing to move out of my parent’s house and into NYC)
bergblum and i launched a “valentine’s day” podcast and he printed “starlight brigade” invitations for me…i was going to give one to desi defino (who was a busty teenage redhead working at the local drug fair) but i never ended up doing so…
“professor imagination speaking. welcome to the JoGa valentine’s day podcast, a weekly dispatch with news from the kingdom of dopeland.
“today is wednesday 14 february 2007…our main story covers the ‘EVOL’ song proclamation, warning of black forces hard at work on valentine’s day…first, it’s time for the seven-day color report…
[color report]
february is blue…
and now for our main story.
[‘EVOL’ song proclamation warns of black forces at work]
joga has proclaimed a state of extreme caution across the kingdom as wide-spread “black forces” threaten to weaken its subjects…
the issue was first brought to joga’s attention when the dwarf pella was spurned from what turned out to be a temporary love affair. the sudden change of affection was dubbed “EVOL”, and is the result of black forces which influence humans to channel their emotions on a narrow trajectory to another person…
the forces are known to change their direction frequently, often leaving one sapped of positive energy when none is reciprocated through a mutually operated emotional channel…
however, it is important to note that the forces are not intrinsically evil, but are, in their very nature, neutral harbingers of change in the relationships of humans. still, joga warns that they are wild in nature and must be tamed to uphold the kingdom and the safety of its subjects…
[a valentine warning]
as the celebration of valentine’s day has spread to some among joga’s loyal following, joga decided to issue a song proclamation this week to help practice the holiday responsibly and understand the forces which can drive even the strongest of men to severe emotional damage…
the now widely-rebroadcast “EVOL” transmission, running at three minutes and twenty seconds, uses the music and metaphor-based hybrid language spoken by the practicers of jogabop to better articulate the nature of the black forces and how to handle them…
joga titled the song EVOL to detail how the aggressive trend of serial monogamy in the west is a threat to a higher love. EVOL, “love” spelled backwards, suggests the constant change of “evolution”. the spelling is thus the inverse of “love” in the same way that EVOL’s Unpredictability is anathema to Love’s Constancy…
this dichotomy is illustrated in the musical structure of the song, contrasting familiar, repeated chord progressions with sustained notes that challenge the stability of each chord, creating tension.
for instance, an F Major 7th Chord changes to the C Major 7Th and then D Minor Chord like many songs in the canon of Western religious music. However, in his proclamation, joga added a prominent ‘A’ to the C Major 7th, signifying the black forces which can influence a change in direction musically as it can alter the trajectory of someone’s love. significantly, the song does not alter its steady path, and it thus stands as an emotional guide to those who wish to avoid suffering in life…
[joga’s advice]
joga advises taking safety from these harmful changes by focusing the black forces towards him, as Love for him will always be returned through his music.
Pledge allegiance to JoGa and to his lifelong mission, an emotional celibacy to restore power to the masculine throne and avoid vulnerability regarding heterosexual emotions:
women, why so confusing?
try to turn the tide…
’til you’re turned away…
just protect your pride…
and keep it all inside ’til your dying day…
in other news, invitations have been issued from jogajungle to those females worthy enough to serve in the STARLIGHT BRIGADE. though the Starlight Brigade was initially formed for the dumb angels of dopeland to stay silent and keep themselves beautiful, joga has issued a formal request for the new members to comment on the “EVOL” Song Proclamation. He will accept any messages sent to the following e-mail address:
jogajungle@gmail.com
(speaking on the state of joga affairs, this is professor imagination…)