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-as of [2 JUNE 2024]–
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“TIGHT END”
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__*AKA*__
“north american football”
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*abbreviated ‘football’*
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*grid-iron football is a ‘football sport’ primarily played in the ‘united states’ + ‘canada’*
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(‘american football’, which uses 11-player teams, is the form played in the ‘united states’ and the best known form of ‘gridiron football’ worldwide, while ‘canadian football’ (featuring 12-player teams) predominates in ‘canada’)
(other derivative varieties include ‘indoor football’, ‘football’ for ‘smaller teams’ (most commonly 8 players), and informal games such as ‘touch’ and ‘flag’ football)
(‘football’ is played at ‘professional’, ‘collegiate’, ‘semi-professional’, and ‘amateur’ levels)
(the sport originated in the 19th century out of older games related to modern ‘rugby football’ and ‘soccer’ (aka ‘association football’))
(‘american’ and ‘canadian’ football developed alongside each other and were originally more distinct before ‘canadian teams’ adopted features of the ‘american game’)
(both varieties are distinguished from other ‘football sports’ by their use of ‘hard plastic helmets’ and ‘shoulder pads’, the ‘forward pass’, the ‘system of downs’, a number of unique ‘rules’ and ‘positions’, measurement in customary units of ‘yards’ (even in ‘canada’, which mostly metricated in the 1970s, yards are still used), and a distinctive ‘brown leather ball’ in the shape of a ‘prolate spheroid’ with ‘pointed ends’)
(the ‘international governing body’ for the sport is the ‘international federation of american football’ (IFAF); although the organization plays all of its ‘international competitions’ under american rules, it uses a definition of the game that is broad enough that it includes ‘canadian football’ under its umbrella, and ‘football canada’ (the governing body for ‘canadian football’) is an ‘IFAF member’)
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“HARVARD FOOTBALL”
“coin toss”
three minutes before the game, the referee meets with the captain of each time for the coin toss…the visiting team calls the toss (“heads” or “tails”)…
the winner of the toss may choose to defer his choice until the second half…
TWO CHOICES:
(either choose to kickoff or receive in the first half…)
OR
(choose which side of the field for the first quarter)
(the teams switch sides at the end of the first quarter and end of the third quarter)
TIME:
four quarters of 15 minutes
(for an hour-long game)
clock is stopped for incomplete pass or out-of-bounds play…
clock is also stopped when measuring for a first down…
each team has 3 timeouts at each half
offense
(the ‘invaders’)
the ‘snap’ from center to quarterback as declaration of war
defense
(the ‘defenders’)
“special teams”
(the “surrender”)
“serve your country!”
(Mad Cow ran to the Quakers for cover)
Kennedy touch football games
i competed as a football player for 8 long years…
(grade 5 to grade 12)
POP WARNER:
begins august 1…
(at the warren sports fields)
(watchung / warren / long hill)
i was initially pegged as a tight end / defensive tackle
“the indians (year 1)”
head coach charles harris
(a gritty young construction worker)
(with no children on the team)
i was petrified of assistant coach ned (“edward”?) galbally
(the rich waspy dad with the star player son)
(…til his eldest son ended up drunk driving his friend right into a tree)
i was always afraid that they’d throw my the ball…
(because i’d always drop the ball in practices)
(pete riccio (assistant assistant coach) from the sidelines: “can’t you catch??!”)
(i was also scared of him…)
(’til his son was permanently paralyzed in a wrestling match…)
they never ended up throwing the ball to me in a game…
and as defensive tackle, i’d always try going to the left or right of the offensive tackle instead of facing him head-on…
(resulting in many embarrassing beratings from galbally during the games…)
(we finished a respectable 5-5)
“the indians (year 2)”
(the following fall i was moved to center)
(because of my late birthday, i remained on the indians while the others in my grade moved up to the “braves”)
(i had to cut weight to make the “90 pound” cutoff)
(which was always a stressful procedure as we weighed in before every game)
(head coach passaro referenced my abilities as a ‘utility man’)
(i would play any position asked of me)
(that just means i was an ‘ultra conformist’ then…which i don’t consider very admirable…)
The next year, I was slated to play quarterback
Then I returned midway through the season as an end
(I had broken my wrist during the summer)
in high school, i played tight end + defensive end
(they considered moving me to guard during 2001 season)
(my father fought vehemently against K-Bos to prevent the move)
(K-Bos gave me father a wake-up call: ‘your son is too small to be an Ivy League tight end’ / I was supposed to be the next Jared Mazzetta!)
Legends circulated of how the Hunterdon Central football team members bench press weights (always hovering somewhere tucked in the 400s)
They were the ‘other’ to aspire to (for me at least)
Young Retard Robo accused me of being ‘in love’ with Mike Carr and the Hunterdon Central mystique
I was slated as the starting tight end during my junior year of high school / I had a particularly good set of hands and had been catching every pass thrown my way in training camp that summer. That is, until double sessions…
our annual “turkey bowl” was a WH / bridgewater extravaganza
(basking ridge is the current thanksgiving day nemesis of WH)
*on the final down of my high school season, i jumped the gun and went offsides as a defensive end*
(in an away loss to bridgewater)
as i walked off the field, middle linebacker cody brenn was screaming in my ear…and freddy vitollo started telling everyone on the bus ride home that i’d told him that i “didn’t care” about the outcome of the game earlier in the week…it must’ve been a close game then…i remember not feeling nervous about bassman throwing me the ball as a tight end (because by that time there was nothing to lose except perpetual pride)…but he kept throwing to his go-to wide receiver jay frank…
we didn’t make the playoffs that year…
(what a way to end a career!)
quarterbacks:
shea smith:
curly lambeau
(founder of the green bay packers)
Curly Lambeau, the team’s founder, solicited funds for uniforms from his employer, the Indian Packing Company. He was given $250 for uniforms and equipment, on condition that the team be named for its sponsor (a similar event would occur the following year with the Decatur Staleys, who later became the Chicago Bears). An early newspaper article referred to the new Green Bay team as “the Indians” but by the time they played their first game they had adopted the name “Packers.”
(established 1919)
(NFC)
COACHES:
Michael John McCarthy
(born November 10, 1963)
(Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania)
head coach of the National Football League’s Green Bay Packers.
national football league:
quarterbacks:
joseph montana:
(san francisco 49ers)
(from pennsylvania)
(notre dame)
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aaron rodgers
(born 1983)
green bay packers quarterback
his touchdown celebration is called “the champion bell”
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*👨🔬🕵️♀️🙇♀️*SKETCHES*🙇♂️👩🔬🕵️♂️*
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💕💝💖💓🖤💙🖤💙🖤💙🖤❤️💚💛🧡❣️💞💔💘❣️🧡💛💚❤️🖤💜🖤💙🖤💙🖤💗💖💝💘
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*🌈✨ *TABLE OF CONTENTS* ✨🌷*
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🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥*we won the war* 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥