-as of [19 SEPTEMBER 2024]-
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(“mcstarr”)
(paul mccartney / ringo starr reunion)
(“flaming pie”)
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(“george” accidentally drives his guitar neck through macca’s throat as macca attempts to adjust a tuning peg for his “two of us” solo)
“i won’t play at all if you don’t want me to play…whatever it is that pleases you…”
(john suppresses a giggle)
(ringo rattles off another perfectly timed malapropism: “well that’ll teach him…”)
“my music”
“not you!”
(says carly simon to livingston taylor)
(just as jerry seinfeld puts down robert kelly)
(‘brian wilson’ appearance on ‘mike douglas show’)
*8 december 1976*
(must of been sometime after “love you”)
(peter buck’s favorite album)
(REM guitarist)
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(brian wilson reading his reviews in rolling stone magazine and his eyes widen as they declare that “this nut’s no genius”)
(john fogerty as a long-lost ‘wilson brother’)
(who burst with juvenalian glee and dreams of machine gun fury as ‘proud mary’ climbs the charts)
(the bored british overlords: ‘this won’t do’)
(so they squash the scenario)
(‘david byrne’ plans to donate his portion of the proceeds to a bicycle tire company)
“copycats”
“hez wuz shawta then yaws…”
enter al jolson:
how do you do? how do you do? no not you!
(as jerry seinfeld shooes off a fawning robert kelly)
(don rickles points finger in face of employee:)
“hey losa look at who’s in fronta you!”
(“DON’T YOU EVA STEP ON MISTA GOLDBUGS SHOES!”)
“race music”
elvis presley was king for a day…
he re-claimed rock music for the white race
(john lennon: ‘before elvis there was nothing…’)
(‘nothing for you, that is…’)
(‘why a british boy could only dream…’)
an oblivious brian wilson rolls down a hill… he reaches the bottom and simply walks into town… he begins rambling on about plans to open up a 24/7 sporting goods store…
(cue ‘bowie’ as british general “jean genie” playing “faux americana” music)
(ala “mumford and sons”)
macca is given a 10-year prison sentence by the japanese for dope smoking
(and britain subsequently invades japan to release their next best national treasure)
(after sending mark david chapman from hawaii to kill off the traitorous john lennon)
then michael jackson reclaimed music for the black race
(solidified when he bought the beatles catalogue + broke MTV color barrier)
he even married elvis’s only daughter
(sticking it to the southern white male oppressor once and for all)
then MJ turned white (the ‘curse of the beatles’)
so music became white by default. the new wave albinos with their cheesy synths took over for a time. goth rock was all the rage. vampires came to claim their slaves…
‘welcome to reagan country!’
(william f buckley patting his creation ronald reagan on the back as they smile for the cameras)
music continued lilywhite through the 80s and 90s, what with hair metal and grunge merely representing opposing poles of the same white male ego.
then hip-hop reclaimed music for the black race slowly but surely. unsurprisingly, it took the death of two icons (tupac + biggie) to bring hip hop to the forefront of pop culture.
then eminem infiltrated hip hop (just as his predecessor vanilla ice had done) by using good old all-american shock value
(above and beyond the mere fact that a blond-hair blue-eyed cherubic manboy was involved in rap at all)
and reclaimed music for the white race
now we’re left with watered down asher roths and sonny bamboos. it time for change.
(do you want these hacks to be the voice of your generation?)
(so MJ claimed universal appeal from beyond the grave)
(*birth of barack / death of MJ marks beginning of post-racial society*)
brian wilson reading his reviews in rolling stone magazine and his eyes widen as they declare that “this nut’s no genius”…
david byrne plans to donate his portion of the proceeds to a bicycle tire company…
“copycats”
“hez wuz shawta then yaws…”
enter al jolson:
how do you do? how do you do? no not you!
(as jerry seinfeld shooes off a fawning robert kelly)
(don rickles points finger in face of employee:)
“hey losa look at who’s in fronta you!”
(“DON’T YOU EVA STEP ON MISTA GOLDBUGS SHOES!”)
“race music”
elvis presley was king for a day…
he re-claimed rock music for the white race
(john lennon: ‘before elvis there was nothing…’)
(‘nothing for you, that is…’)
(‘why a british boy could only dream…’)
an oblivious brian wilson rolls down a hill… he reaches the bottom and simply walks into town… he begins rambling on about plans to open up a 24/7 sporting goods store…
macca is given a 10-year prison sentence by the japanese for dope smoking
(and britain subsequently invades japan to release their next best national treasure)
(after sending mark david chapman from hawaii to kill off the traitorous john lennon)
then michael jackson reclaimed music for the black race
(solidified when he bought the beatles catalogue + broke MTV color barrier)
he even married elvis’s only daughter
(sticking it to the southern white male oppressor once and for all)
then MJ turned white (the ‘curse of the beatles’)
so music became white by default. the new wave albinos with their cheesy synths took over for a time. goth rock was all the rage. vampires came to claim their slaves…
‘welcome to reagan country!’
(william f buckley patting his creation ronald reagan on the back as they smile for the cameras)
music continued lilywhite through the 80s and 90s, what with hair metal and grunge merely representing opposing poles of the same white male ego.
then hip-hop reclaimed music for the black race slowly but surely. unsurprisingly, it took the death of two icons (tupac + biggie) to bring hip hop to the forefront of pop culture.
then eminem infiltrated hip hop (just as his predecessor vanilla ice had done) by using good old all-american shock value (above and beyond the mere fact that a blond-hair blue-eyed cherubic manboy was involved in rap at all) and reclaimed music for the white race
now we’re left with watered down asher roths and sonny bamboos.
it time for change. do you want these hacks to be the voice of your generation?
(so MJ claimed universal appeal from beyond the grave)
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(*birth of barack / death of MJ marks beginning of post-racial society*)
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(both half-jewish)
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*👨🔬🕵️♀️🙇♀️*SKETCHES*🙇♂️👩🔬🕵️♂️*
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👈👈👈☜*“PAST MASTERS”* ☞ 👉👉👉
*FAIRY TALES*
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💕💝💖💓🖤💙🖤💙🖤💙🖤❤️💚💛🧡❣️💞💔💘❣️🧡💛💚❤️🖤💜🖤💙🖤💙🖤💗💖💝💘
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*🌈✨ *TABLE OF CONTENTS* ✨🌷*
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🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥*we won the war* 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥