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(university of florida)
(class of 2008)
(warrington college of business administration)
(university of south florida)
(masters of science in marketing)
krista sinardi
(summer 2007)
an NYC intern who’d watched one too many MTV reality shows.
i met her that summer while attending a bar where my BGC co-worker “joe” was guest-bartending. it was a weeknight. i had nothing to eat and got stoned on my vaporizer before drinking heavily at the bar.
my motivation
(my refuge from the guidas)
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9 JANUARY 2016:
(friended her on the “joga bot” account)
(she hasn’t responded yet)
SUMMER 2007:
(after spending the day with d’arcy)
(a girl i met at a wall street bar)
(“joey” was guest bartender)
(so i drank for free with gus)
(and met vanessa sena and guida cristina)
(and used my “gatti” name to fend off guidos)
(because i said a polka-dot dressed guidette looked like brian wilson’s jewish wife marilyn rovell)
(she thought i said she looked like brian wilson)
(“so i look like a dude???”)
(“no no no!”)
(then i sat next to krista)
(i hadn’t eaten after work)
(only vaporizer)
(then i started drinking)
(i blacked out that night)
(ended up taking the queens subway back and forth)
(and i slept through my alarm the next day)
(d’arcy took it in stride)
(it was my first late day)
(krista “spotted me right away”)
(and immediately started flirting with me)
(then conman showed up)
(and francesca started flirting with him)
(he noticed that she was touching his leg)
(then he left…)
(she was an intern for “berk communications”)
(full service public relations firm specializing in food, travel, product, celebrity and athlete representation)
(ronald berkowitz is the president)
(jews are good at representing (and mimicking) others)
(middle-aged jew hiring college girls as interns)
• Created marketing and PR strategies for consumer product clients by analyzing demographic data of publications.
• Generated press kits, helped write press releases, brainstormed for special events, and pitched to New York publications.
(then i followed the girls in a taxi to a beer pong bar)
(then i got more fucked up)
(i remember sloppily making out with krista)
(i ran the spring lakes 5K the following day)
(and i was preparing to have sex with krista that weekend)
(but she stopped returning my ‘phone calls’)
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👈👈👈☜*back to “XXX”* ☞ 👉👉👉
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💕💝💖💓🖤💙🖤💙🖤💙🖤❤️💚💛🧡❣️💞💔💘❣️🧡💛💚❤️🖤💜🖤💙🖤💙🖤💗💖💝💘
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*🌈✨ *TABLE OF CONTENTS* ✨🌷*
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🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥*we won the war* 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥